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Facade that seems real.
but not knowing what is beneath it,
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http://endure-the-unseen.blogspot.com Tears of frustration, she held within So tied down, she's suffocating The mask she wears to hide it all Those suppressed hurts behind the wall Too held up in things, the world passed Oblivious to her hurts inside One day, she finally gave up Sink into despondency Nobody cares, she's torn apart She wanted to become a star Shinning in the sky for others Looking down from the sky Looking back at all the past that happened The tears she cried The hidden feelings she's never shown She wonders if there's really love She wonders if she is worth being loved She wonders if there will be a day where she can fall madly in love Maybe its love Only when there's forever her story Thursday, December 27, 2007! Tuesday, December 25, 2007! Tuesday, December 18, 2007! sitting all alone in an empty room, not knowing what happened, only to realised tears flowing down my cheeks. walking by the streets, all alone. thinking of the meaning in life, at that point of time, i found no meaning in life. only feeling the hurt inside, like a knife pierce through my heart. the pain n hurt that i feel right now, so hurt , so broken inside. no one would every know how it is like, only u lord, only u. the only one that would be by my side, no matter what happens, you are always there, telling me my child, there are things in life that causes the hurt n pain but always know that i would be there for u no matter what. know that i would not give u more than what u can bear. even if things don't go the way u want them to, i might have a better plan for u, so child, don't worry, leave everything to me, lie in my arms and i would tell u everything is fine. no one can hurt u as long as i am around. i can only tell myself that everything will be over soon.. only u lord can take away the pain.. there's a song: how could i live without u how could i survive without ur love without ur touch you're the one that heals me and cleanses my heart and sets me free now i come right before u with my hands lifted up and my heart humbly bowed at the work on the cross as you hung there and die you were paying the price for my life, for my life for ur love is higher than the heavens is deeper than the sea and all i want is you in my life no one else can satisfy my soul can make me feel this way only u lord only u. no one knows what is going on in my life. no one really cares about what i've been though. tough times, the hurts n pains that could kill. wanting to end everything just this moment, but things are going in different ways, never going the way i though it might be. the world is selfish, i admit that at times i may be selfish. but im constantly giving in to everyone, everything that they want, & pretend that im not hurt by the things that happen. but somehow the blame eventually falls on me, not knowing why things happen this way. i know im the one causing hurt n pain to everyone, fine i admit, i suck. sorry. no one ever see the tears that i shed, no one knows how the hurt can really be, the pain that pierced through my heart. im the only one allowed to get hurt by people, life is FAIR.. this FAIR. even if i die, there would not be a single tear shed, but maybe, there would be tears of joy. Tuesday, December 04, 2007!  this camp was quite fun though we got some scolding here n there but i really learnt a lot.. it was from the 29 nov till 2 dec.. starting day was jj birthday den ending was jing wen's birthday(brother n sister).. lol.. there was abt 25 ppl(youths) that went for this camp if i'm not wrong.. got 3 new comers.. wan lin, jun le n sining(she's my secret pal) lol. ((: our grouping were not wad we really wanted cos like the rooms, my room have hui xin, wen xin, me, jie si, sining n jia qi.. the other room got li jun,wan lin,xi hua,my sis,hui min n zhi xuan.. plus moh li.. but the first night jie si n xi hua changed room.(n got scolded cos of that).. the day we arrived at camp was abt 2 plus 3 in the afternoon.. this camp was held at the changi SAF holiday chalet(not very sure of the name)haha.. after we arrived there, we put our bags in our rooms.. the room is nice n comfortable.. n for the 3 nights i got to sleep on the bed haha.. i like my roomates.. haha they very quiet.. not like the other room.. haha.. jk.. after putting our things, we had the opening of the camp n then had some games.. one of the games was to have a secret pal.. we picked a name each n than got to write letter to one another.. than we also had some snatch chair game n wacko.. we had duck rice for dinner at 6pm den at 7pm was the first session of "sharing". the topic was 'yuan dian'.. lead by moh li.. it was sort of the beginning.. we watch some video den we had discussion.. my discussion grp was with xh,jq,hx,ml,sn,karel n aunty.. the discussion made me realised that after everything around us happens, no matter wad, we always have to go back to the beginning when God first created us..the point he created us on this earth is to serve him.. not for anything else.. we have to have the Image Of God how we should be like.. how to love others, to care for others.. the 9 spiritual fruits(dunno whether correct translation).. those are wad God has n he would want us to all have that.. after discussion, we had our supper den cos it was the first night cannot really sleep well plus cos i told xh somethings than she very sad with me n i suppose jq also(though jq was so quiet but i know she was listening)..haha. so slept at abt 12 plus 1am.. the next morning we woke up quite early though we suppose to wake up at 7:30am n morning exercise at 8am.. i woke up at like 7am to wash up n prepare breakfast.. den we played dog n bone n had some exercise den had breakfast.. after breakfast was Q.T(quiet time).. only me n yin pei cos on that day sining haven come.. we shared abt God creating the earth n wad response we had.. i think i really thank God for letting us come on this earth n he's almighty, the only God that i would believe in.. ((: hmm, after Q.T, we had some time of singing than the next session was "wu dian".. lead by yin pei.. is abt our sin.. we watched "the inconvenient truth".. is abt global warming.. abt us human polluting the earth causing the ozone layer to open a hole.. is like we know that we have sin but we are still not really bothering abt it n continue to sin.. causing our God to be very unhappy n disappointed with us.. n the cost that we have to pay when we sin is that our spirit in us would die.. as in spiritually death.. that when we die, we would go to hell if we do not repent now.. after the session we had discussion n part of it was what i just said.. n than was lunch, we had chicken rice.. it was quite nice.. x) than we had games.. my grp consist of jie si,me,jun le,hui min,wei dao n wan lin.. we had some thinking games that require thinking than some other games.. cant really rmb the games but just name wad i rmbed.. it was the sewing the banana one, than the toothpick n coins one.. than the stacking of the newspapers. it was the thinking games for the 2nd n 3rd day.. than at 4 plus we go bathe.. than had dinner at 6pm.. we had vegetables with rice.. than had another session on "en dian" woon liang was the one leading n this time we watched "The Passion Of Christ". it was really very touching though i din really cry but really very hurt to see that Jesus died on the cross for our sin.. very painful, the way they torture him really was terrible.. really made a few of us cry.. n that Jesus can forgive all of the people that nail him on the cross n us that we sin against God.. during discussion, i really thought alot.. abt God sending his only son to earth to save us, nail on the cross n die for us.. i really very guilty of my sin n very glad that Jesus came down to earth to save us.. to redeem us, give us a new life.. after the discussion, we had supper.. n jj's father brought food for us.. n hx's mother also brought us some food.. den we had lots of food..(actually not alot) than is our grp's turn to wash toilet den we go sleep.. not so early though 12 plus also.. but is talk till 12 plus..lol.. the next morning i woke up at 7 plus also.. than had morning exercise den we played captain's ball.. jj one grp den ben one grp n me xh,js,wd,jr,hm maybe got somemore cant rmb in jj grp n we WON!! yay.. i din know how i managed to score so many goals.. almost all.. lol.. seriously din know how.. cos just throw den he caught the ball.. haha.. oh n the ball dropped into the fountain once.. lol.. hmm.. den after exercise, we had breakfast than had Q.T.. with sining that morning cos she came at 9 plus.. den we had another session.. it was " zuan lie dian" sort of the turning point of our lives.. when the point we accepted Christ.. jing wen was the one leading us.. den she asked us to write a story using the newspaper words.. den paste them to make a story.. n after doing so, she explained that we can get to be the director of making a story.. n so how would our own lives be like when we are the director of our own life.. wad would our lives be, whether we would accept God or not n whether we would make the right decision at different point of times.. than we had lunch, nasi lemak.. i thought it was the nicest food out of the few days.. haha.. i'm being bad.. but all the food was okay.. than we had games at 2pm liddat at the chalet den no drizzle den went to the beach, it was high tide at that point of time(a bit of drizzle).. cos of the drizzle we had some games the newspaper one n sort of amazing race(we WON)..lol.. got one game is use some toothpick one n coins that one we got win n lose.. after all those games, we played water bomb at the beach(the item we had to protect was a piece of tissue paper) very difficult even though we were so close to each other.. we were sort of like very very close holding/squeezing one another closely.. but we lost cos the tissue was wet n like going to have hole alr.. lol..(jl was beside me)..lol.. :)) than we also played some game needing to use string to hook the cans out of the circle den our team cos of js n jl, they first to go den got 2 cans out of the circle n we WON with 2 cans!! haha.. than we also had a game the human #.. is like wad we normally play but is human one.. when our number get called den must snatch the spaces to join a line..(actually i think i got the games mixed up cos cant really rmb we played wad game on which day..) anw, after the games, we went back but din bath cos we have bbq at 5:30pm..abt there.. than we had sausages,chicken wings,beef,pork and mashmallows,grass jelly.. we had quite some fun n some funny things happened.. wait till i find that morning song lyrics from the kids den i will see want put up not..lol.. from the few days, the playground had the most memories i guess.. ppl sat there cry, laugh like siao over some things.. many things happened there..lol.. ((: got both good n bad.. we talked there play there than at abt 8 plus 9pm, we had a [night of sharing session] (N.O.S).. starting we had sang some songs than our secret pal was revealed.. hmm, those that i rmbed was xh's secret pal was js, js's one was wd, wl's was ml, mine was sn, jj's one was my sis, ben's one was xh, wx's one was jj, jr's one was me,hm's one was cw,cw's one was wl.. jq's one is jerome,jerome's one was jq.. this two was the funniest.. cos wife got husband's one den jq n jerome got each other's.. haha.. that's all i could rmb.. ((: we shared abt wad we learnt, what we like.. i enjoyed the games n song sessions.. n the most was the "en dian" one.. cos that video really touched me alot.. how Jesus came to earth to save us.. but some of them said sleep than __ upset.. that really made some of us worried cos she suddenly cry den very shocked but now know she should be ok so not so worried.. that night everyone very quiet.. no one dare make noise n cos the next day got baptism den must sleep at 11pm but we din cos need bathe n everything.. yup.. but that was the night that everyone was very tired i guess.. n it was our last night there.. miss the bed.. lol.. the next morning we woke up quite late.. den suppose to be our group make breakfast but we woke up at 8 plus den ended up all the adults do den we just eat.. haha :) we had Q.T after breakfast den need to pack our things go to church.. that Q.T session made me think quite a bit.. |
girl living in her own world Grace.T September 14th 1992 Ex St.Margs girl Graduated from Smps, Smss Currently studying in Temasek Poly yr 3 BSG(Dip in Bus)!!! ❤ 3B12 (: tse_1992@hotmail.com A girl that is quite emotional! BEWARE! moodswings! ♥ God cos' he love her too! Tied down to church on 021207 Music is what she loves I just simply enjoy being a secondary school girl. And yea, I'm eighteen. You can bold ; italic ; underline & desires - ♥ ___ - Find back myself - Meet up with classmates! - - New wallet that can put pic - iPod Touch - 165cm tall! - new shoes - polaroid - new clothes - - Watch movies > > > > > The Last Song - Sony Cybershot T700 - Go out more with friends! - plan 4e2 class reunion - Go out with Jia qi when she's back - Learn how to play guitar - Get a new pencilcase - Enjoy Poly life in TP (: - Do well in poly and aim not to fail any subjects! - Be loved, feel loved, to love - Be nicer to everyone and myself the best damn thing 4E2 (: Alyssa Carissa Caroline Cherry Jasmine ❤ Karen ❤ Marion Oviyum Sandra Sasha Tia Yan ping School Mates :D Arlene Amanda Aretha Charite Elaine Genevive Gloria Iman (: Jean Julia (: Olivia Pei lin Priscilla Si min Tricia Vera Church (= Bkccy Hong ting Hui min❤ Hui qi Jia qi (: Jie rui Jie si Jun le Sock ling Vanessa Yi qi Hui min ❤ 1B12 Alstar Choon yip Kerine Melody Michelle Nabila Noreen Zhijun (: 2B15 Winnie Seniors in SMSS ((: Ling Yogam Smps Friends/Other Friends ((: Audrey Austin Chris Hao ning Kimberly Nic tan Rebecca [: Vincent Xin yu Link leave a note archives May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 May 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 November 2011 January 2012 March 2012 credits designer 1 2 3 icons: i forgot. tell me if you know [: |